Cathy Liska Remember times when you have been shut down and frustrated? Remember telling someone what you wanted to no avail?
Remember being asked for advice, giving great suggestions, and then learning none of your ideas were used?
There is a better way! Coach training develops skills that afford you the ability to listen effectively, understand others, flex to an approach that is effective, and enhance your communication process to create the positive outcomes you want. 
Consider this conversation between friends:
Ana: Hi, how is work going?
Bill: Okay, I guess. I wish there was an easier way to coordinate everyone’s schedule.
Ana: Why don’t you just tell them the scheduled time and ask them to RSVP?
Bill: Oh no – they are required to be there, so we have to find a time that works.
Ana: So why don’t you plan it on a set schedule?
Bill: Well, with what is happening around here there is no way that would work. Thanks anyway for the idea.
What is happening? Ana is simply unaware of the nuances of the situation, so the ideas are generic in nature. With coaching, the premise is that the individual is their own best expert, so the approach is to listen and ask questions.
Ana: Hi, how is work going?
Bill: Okay I guess. I wish there was an easier way to coordinate everyone’s schedule.
Ana: How do you do it now?
Bill: I call each person and check on possible dates or availability.
Ana: What do you recommend changing?
Bill: I wish I could just talk to them all at once.
Ana: What are the options for doing that?
Bill: I don’t know – this is what I am told to do.
Ana: If it works better how will everyone feel about a change?
Bill: Good, I guess.
Ana: What kinds of changes are possible?
Bill: We could schedule the next one when everyone is together in the first place.
Ana: What else?
Bill: I could email everyone simultaneously.
Ana: What else?
Bill: I could have a calendar everyone can access.
Ana: What are you going to do?
Bill: I am going to suggest to everyone when they are together that we schedule the next time then or that we have a calendar everyone can access. I think they will go for it, and if they don’t I will ask if I can email everyone instead of having to call.
Ana: Seems like you really know your stuff – good idea.
Bill: Thanks.
Coaching really is this simple: instead of telling, ask.
